Alma Mater, Stand Forever

A few words about the actions on the field of the student-athletes at my alma mater, the University Of Miami...
I was not able to see the game live in Denver, but I tried to see the highlights as soon as I heard what happened. After seeing the footage and taking in the commentary of every sports reporter capable of picking up a pencil or opening his/her mouth, I have tried to stay as objective as possible. For the most part, I agree with the majority that the suspensions were not severe enough. Anthony Reddick (a.k.a. Dat Helmet Swingin' MoFo) should be gone. Not just off the team, but out of the school. Brandon Meriweather (a.k.a Sir Stomps-A-Lot) should be suspended for the rest of the season. As my boy Adler said, "every time he stomped it cost him like ten grand (in NFL Draft money)." As for the rest: one game for anyone involved and at least two games if you came off the bench. I realize that if the Canes win out this year, they still have a shot at a BCS game, but honestly (and this is saying a lot, coming from me), I would rather they forget about wins and losses for the rest of the year and concentrate on getting the program back on track.
There is a certain swagger or cockiness that goes along with wearing "The U," but you have to be able to back it up. Right now there are ZERO players on the roster worthy of being on the same field as guys like Ken Dorsey, Edgerrin James, Santana Moss, Jonathan Vilma, and Ed Reed. Some of the aforementioned players weren't very highly recruited (Santana Moss came to UM on a track scholarship), but they were given a shot, coached correctly, and their attitude came across as deservedly confident rather than entitled cockiness.
I don't know if Larry Coker will be back next year. I feel bad for the situation his players have put him in, but at the same time he has the final say on which kids get the honor of playing for the Hurricanes. He hasn't done a very good job recruiting quality individuals. The physical talent is still there, but while the Canes of 3-5 years ago played beyond their years, the present squad seems to have all the patience and poise of a class of second graders visiting Colonial Williamsburg.
All that being said, it seems like most analysts were just waiting for the program to stumble so they could pounce. I sure many writers had their Mad Libs-style columns ready to go... insert head coach's name here, insert school president's name here... it stinks worse than Lake Osceola on a hot summer day. Of the columns I've read, Bill Curry's seems the most thought out.
The program will survive this melee, but not without scars which will never fade for some. Even after all involved parties have left the school, Miami will still be known as "Thug U" or "Convict U," which is something that, as hard as we may want to change, will always loom until a coach, athletic director, and school president are in power who are not afraid to carry out a zero tolerance policy for athletes.

Saber Haven

I was looking at the NECBL2 full standings yesterday and couldn't figure out how I'm in the overall lead. So, like any normal person would do, I calculated some stats:

TEAM	AVG	OBP	SLG	OPS		ERA	WHIP	K/9
BAL	0.286	0.356	0.489	0.845		3.68	1.26	6.86
CRV	0.284	0.369	0.516	0.885		4.25	1.31	6.24
CHI	0.276	0.358	0.469	0.827		3.60	1.17	8.64
MAR	0.289	0.381	0.478	0.859		4.01	1.28	7.19
MHI	0.286	0.368	0.475	0.843		3.76	1.22	7.16
NHV	0.269	0.334	0.433	0.767		4.68	1.36	7.77
SPD	0.276	0.345	0.478	0.823		3.90	1.21	6.72
WOO	0.286	0.359	0.496	0.855		4.10	1.35	7.13

So yeah, just like I thought...It's all Papelbon.

"...I don't know if we'll have enough time!"

50 free points to the first owner to rename their baseball team the Tewksbury Ganjabricks...

World Cup: T-Minus Ten

[Plugged In To: LAUNCHcast: My Station ]

With a little more than a week left until the kickoff of the World Cup, I am fully ready and amped to cheer on the U.S. MNT (Men's National Team) for the next month and change. "But-- but JB, soccer is boring and sucks a lot." Give it a chance, I say.

Over the past several weeks I have been spending much of my down time at work doing my research on the sport. That includes, but is not limited to: thorough breakdown of several team rosters, figuring out who the best players in the tournament are and watching appropriate highlights (thanks YouTube), watching Fox Sports World Report, keeping up with the news, and catching as much of the U.S. friendly matches as I could.

I casually followed the happenings in the English Premier League last season, but in a relatively short amount of time, I have come to have a new appreciation for the sport. My boy J-Mazz and I were all about the World Cup in 2002, but I have a feeling it will be on a whole new level this time around. I'm not going to get into specifics as to why I think I now like soccer, but if you know me, and you respect my knowledge of sports as a whole, you won't give me any crap. I've done my research, and yes, soccer is legit in my book.

I'm going to try to use the World Cup as an excuse to start updating a little more regularly, so that alone should be reason for the five of you that check this on a regular basis to respect the game a little.

Tossin' Softballs K-5

Not much going on in KFS-world as of late:

• The ABA2K season has wrapped up and awards aren't due to be handed out until the Commissioner stops weeping himself to sleep.
• NECBL2 (damn we need a new name) hasn't quite hit full stride yet and seems to be inching perilously close to a season where every team finishes .500
• Nobody can start planning their ALF draft strategy until next week, when all the Trojans and Hurricanes have been assigned to their respective awful pro teams.

So in the interim, here is the long-ago promised gold mine of youth sports information I happened upon during one of recent stays at the old Court St homestead. Strap yourselves in for this trip down awkward memory lane...

On Sunday 6/5/88, the eyes of the Elm City - nay, all of greater Cheshire County - were focused on the hallowed and dew-soaked grounds of Alumni Field. There, girls and boys from Alstead to Zwanzey battled each other for bragging rights and the coveted Blue Ribbon of Participation and Fun. Here then, are selected results from the 1988 Junior Olympics:

THIRD GRADE
Boys Long Jump
1. Nick Goulas, Chesterfield
2. Jason Chamberlain, Symonds
3. Mike Eyman, Fuller
(NOTES: Goulas!...Not a good day for Symonds, as you'll see...same for Wheelock - nice job East and West Keene!...Jason Chamberlain was already 6'8" 125 lb)
(PREDICTION: Watts will crack up at the name Mike Eyman)

GIRLS LONG JUMP
1. Emily Dobson, Franklin
2. Celena Chickering, Chesterfield
3. Stefanie Rosinski, Daniels
(NOTES: Dobson prevents the Chesterfield sweep, but would later become sister-in-law to the boys winner. How fucking weird...Celena got so pissed, she kicked everyone's ass for the next 10 years...StefRo just took a normal step and finished 3rd)
(PREDICTION: Celena Chickering will not marry Jason Chamberlain)

BOYS 40-YARD DASH
1. Nick Benjamin, Chesterfield
2. Craig Blanchard, Franklin
3. Marco Salce, Fuller
(NOTES: What is in the Connecticut River water in Chesterfield? Must be all the amphetamines Westmoreland dumps in it...Blanchard still holds the record for fasted time while baked...Marco went on to way easier athletic endeavors, such as catching and wrestling)
(PREDICTION: None of these guys can run 40 yards anymore)

GIRLS 40-YARD DASH
1. Julie Nowak, Daniels
2. Nicole Castor, Wheelock
3. Karilyn Saunders, Franklin
(NOTES: Quite the diverse group here, huh?)
(PREDICTION: Karilyn keeps her bronze medal right next to her Dartmouth diploma)

BOYS 440-YD RUN
1. Mike Cody, Chesterfield
2. Dan Moylin (sic), Symonds
3. Tom Askey, Fuller
(NOTES: Who are 2 people who have never been in my kitchen, and one who has been in my kitchen with the word "Tombo" shaved in the back of his head. Good times. Did they spell Danny Sprinter's name wrong or was this some prototype version of the Moylan we grew to know later?)
(PREDICTION: Tom Askey will never catch for Rick Ankiel)

GIRLS 440-YD RUN
1. Erin Aeschilman, St Joe's
2. Kim Fuller, Chesterfield
3. Chloe Wampler, Fuller
(NOTES: That's all 3rd place finishes for the mighty Fuller School Panthers so far. Is there anyone out there who can close the deal?...Hell, a Fuller took 2nd, and she's from Chesterfield...Whatever happened to that Aeschilman girl, anyway?)
(PREDICTION: So many Chloe Wampler running jokes, so little blog)

GIRLS SOFTBALL TOSS
1. Mary Tolman, St Joe's
2. Beth Hammond, Fuller
3. Julie Johnson, Wheelock
(NOTES: Zzzzzzzzzz)
(PREDICTION: Beth Hammond's granddaughter will medal in this event next year)

AND THE MAIN EVENT:
BOYS SOFTBALL TOSS
1. Ryan Friedman, Fuller
2. Jason Thomas, Chesterfield
3. Rejean Guerriero, St Joe's
(NOTES: TAKE THAT, STINKTOWN!..What a murderers row of accuracy experts. Right?)
(PREDICTION: I will never touch a softball again)

By the way, the FOURTH GRADE boys softball throw podium?
1.Matt Lamoreaux
2.Matt Clark
3.Josh Carbone

Eek.

That's enough for now. Sorry I don't have the Class of '98 covered here for the tall kid sector of KFS. Coming soon...Stats from the 1988 and 1989 Junior League Orioles, and the complete schedule for Rec League Basketball.

Street Clothes

Quiz time, kids. Team X is coming off two straight runner-up finishes in ABA2K. Team X got burned last year by not having Shaquille O'Neal around playoff time. Team X decides to trade Shaq. So I ask you, what happens next?

A) Team X finally wins their championship, thanks to great health and the dominating performance of Andres Nocioni
B) Team X finishes 5th as Shaq leads new squad to 105-0 record
C) Team X's other 2 remaining keepers get hurt, they finish 2nd again, and Aubrey Huff trips on a frigging bullpen mound and lands on the DL.

Make some room on the bench, Chris. Here comes King James (and Al Harrington). And make some room on the Yahoo!Mantle! while you're at it. Daddy's bringing home another silver trophy.

If LeBron comes back, please disregard this post. Except for the Aubrey Huff part. He's a loser.