2008 Draft Preview: Speedway Starwipes

The following entry was submitted by Grashow.

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Announced Keepers

Chase Utley, Miguel Cabrera, Troy Tulowitzki, Ryan Braun, Matt Holiday

Off-Season

If the list of keepers for the fast-roading celestial towelettes that call themselves the Speedway Starwipes does not send a shiver up your spine, then you need stop reading this right now and go take a look at just about any list of top fantasy baseball players available on the Internet or in any magazine. The only thing that could make this lineup any more fearsome would be to replace only semi-awesome shortstop Troy Tulowhatshisname with one of MLB’s top sluggers. Of course this “top slugger” would have to be someone who consistently finishes at the top of the league in points and is in the prime of his career. Possibly someone who plays at a position that allows him to focus on offense (like first base), possibly playing for a team that he rooted for growing up, possibly in a contract year, possibly with a name that throws opposing pitchers off with complicated sequences of vowels every time they look at his uniform… but where would you find a player like that?

Well, anyway, as if their fearsome five-some wasn’t enough to set them up for the season to come, Speedway also wriggled through the rule book to make a trade that landed them an extra 13th round pick in exchange for their funny name pick (karma be damned!). This team is looking so good that one can’t help but wonder when GM Friedman will feel the need to step in and trade away some of this top talent for some “high upside” replacements.

Draft Outlook

With a rock solid offense virtually assured by their keeper picks, the Starwipes may be in the market for some pitching by the time the 6th round rolls along. Will they be able to avoid the longing looks coming from the puppy-dog eyes of recently discarded All-Star pitcher Jake Peavy long enough to pull the trigger on someone else? My guess is no.
SIXTH ROUND PICK (6): Jake “the K-Snake” Peavy

2008 Draft Preview: Baltimore Devil Jays

Announced Keepers

Johan Santana, Prince Fielder, Grady Sizemore, Adam Dunn, Victor Martinez

Off-Season

GM Grashow, sans basketball, team spent all of his off season on one thing... winning a football title. GM Grashow has now turned is attention towards baseball which could be a scary proposition given his keepers. This is the first year in a while that his expectations will not rely on the state of NH as Chris Carpenter was not invited back in 2008 (at least not as a keeper).

Draft Outlook

There are lots of pitchers for the choosing this year as only 3 pitchers were kept going into 2008. This would seem to set the stage for Baltimore, a franchise known for pitching, to complement Johan Santana with another capable second starter. While this is unlikely to be Baltimore fan favorites Tim Lincecum, Liriano, or Carpenter (not in the 6th round anyway) there will likely another strikeout pitcher on his way to Baltimore soon.
6th Round Pick (7): Erik Bedard

2008 Draft Preview: Los Angeles Squatters of Anaheim

Announced Keepers

David Wright, Alfonso Soriano, Travis Hafner, Jason Bay, Brandon Webb

Off-Season

Bob Colayco is much like Carmen San Diego. Having attended the fantasy football draft while in Germany there is much anticipation to see where Bob will select his baseball team from. There is one thing for certain though... and that is Jason Bay will be wearing the Squatters jersey in 2008. After the unintentional non-keeper debacle of 2007 Bob is taking no chances this year.

Draft Outlook

Bob is one of the most versatile GMs in KFS. He has retooled this franchise from a team with keepers including Bret Boone, Jason Schmidt, and Derek Lowe to one that threatens to make the playoffs rather consistently (and includes Jason Bay). Bob has no aversion to going against conventional KFS wisdom (see pitcher as keeper), and will likely stay his own course.
Round 6 Pick (3): Jake Peavy

2008 Draft Preview: New Haven Traffic Cones

Announced Keepers

Carlos Pena, Brian Roberts, Aramis Ramirez, Carl Crawford, Ichiro

Off-Season

Jeff Stanley has been a busy guy. After guiding his football team the playoffs again he briefly flirted with making the playoffs in basketball too. Returning to baseball, Jeff has renewed hope that he will be able to double his baseball postseasons in 2008. Jeff feels comfortable with his keepers and in fact challenged all other teams to a relay race of keepers. At one point Jeff proposed changing this league to a Track and Field fantasy league. Fortunately this proposal never made it out of subcommittee.

Draft Outlook

If Jeff has one weakness as a baseball owner it is closers, and old players. Fine, if Jeff has two weaknesses as a fantasy baseball owner they are closers and keepers. While this would seem to lead the reader to say this is where Mariano Rivera goes off the board... it is unlikely in round 6 as Jeff hasn't taken a closer in the sixth round since at least 2002 (fun fact). This is not to say that Jeff will not use picks 7-25 to select 19 closers.
Sixth Round Pick (2): Manny Ramirez

2008 Draft Preview: Marshall Street Menace

Announced Keepers

Joe Mauer, Brian McCann, Derek Jeter, CC Sabathia, Carlos Lee

Off-Season

Having grown hungrier over the off season, GM Watterson is looking to turn this franchise around to its glory days... of 2003. While GM Watts made the playoffs in 2005, championships are what they count on on Marshall St., not first round defeats. After being unable to land anyone via trade, GM Watts has turned his attention to the draft. He will examine many prospects as the world, as they say, is his oyster with the first pick.

Draft Outlook

After missing some recent drafts GM Watterson has seemed to renew his focus and is going to lead by example. Figuring if he shows up, maybe his team will do likewise. Having been devastated by injuries to keepers BJ Ryan and Troy Glaus last year, Watts has likely sworn off the Blue Jays (and Canada as a whole). This would mean no Roy Halladay, Vernon Wells, or even Andres Galarraga. Appearing to be set at catcher could also be a smoke screen as Watts targeted the 3 top catchers in the league in 2007's draft.
Sixth Round Pick (1): Russell Martin

2008 Draft Preview: Chicago Tiger Army

Announced Keepers

Ryan Howard, Mark Teixeira, Carlos Beltran, Hunter Pence, Lance Berkman

Off-Season

Well, it finally happened. After years and years of hard work and several near-misses, Adler finally has some proof that, at least sometimes, he does not suck. So after winning his first-ever championship what does the Tiger Army owner have in store for an encore? How about a controversial pre-draft trade of a pick for a keeper for starters? Adler was able to steal switch-hitting slugger Mark Teixeira from the Speedway Starwipes for a 13th round pick. The addition of Teixeira gives the Tiger Army three of baseball's premier switch-hitters. Rumor has it that Adler is now eying Jimmy Rollins of the Mackerel and Jose Reyes of the Pimp Roostas in hopes of one day putting together an entire roster of switch-hitters.

Draft Outlook

With the core of this once directionless team now securely in the hands of Da Yung Bux (Ryan Howard, Hunter Pence, and Teixeira), Adler can afford to take some chances on draft day. Although he'll be losing a 13th round pick, as one ECB owner pointed out, "I'll probably wind up cutting everyone after my first three picks anyway." True statement. The addition of Teixeira and the legendary draft-prep done in Chicago means that Adler's Army has to be considered one of the top teams again in 2008, with a legitimate shot to make a run at a repeat.
SIXTH ROUND PICK (5): Justin Morneau