Monday, March 26, 2007

Top 10: Mocking Myself

I'll be honest, I haven't really been prepping for the draft as well as I have in years past. Of course, the time-invested-to-quality-pick ratio that I displayed last year pretty much indicated that I wasted my time. It's always hard to judge Spring Training, so I try not to pay attention. The problem is that baseball is my favorite pro sport, so I can't stay away from it. The results of the column reading and box score research that I do pre-season have produced the likes of Jay Gibbons, Brad Wilkerson, and Daniel Cabrera as fantasy picks. That Gabe Gross pick I made in 2005 wasn't a humor pick. He was supposed to be my draft steal. That all vanished when the Blue Jays sent him to AAA. This year don't be surprised if I grab any of the following players:

Daniel Cabrera - I... can't... stop... Seriously, if this guy ever wins more than 12 games, it had better be for my team.
Garret Anderson - G.A. was a cornerstone of my teams when I was in college. Apparently he's healthy this year. Which means I should expect big numbers again. Which I will expect. And probably not get.
Troy Tulowitzki - He's the next great thing in this town. And he's got an awesome Polish name to boot. Besides, why have only one fantasy player on my hometown team, when I can have two?
Aaron Harang - No one else will take him. I can almost guarantee it.
Dan Uggla - I don't even like this guy. I guess I have a soft spot for him just because everyone on Yahoo! says he's going to suck, when in fact it is they who suck.
Khalil Greene - So my hybrid SS/MI could be named Khalil Tulowitzki. I have just decided that my first born son shall be named Khalil Tulowitzki Bielecki.
Kenny Rogers - Just the kind of somewhat decent, undesirable pitcher that would wind up on my team. Ooo, he's having a good spring. The dude is 43, Bielecki. He ain't gonna have a breakout year.
Felix Hernandez - I usually make one pick every year with the sole purpose of drawing the envy of the rest of the league. At least until Week 2. I (or whoever takes 'Lix) will be that person.
Raul Ibanez - The hitters' version of Aaron Harang. He is also the son-in-law of the lady I worked for at UM.
Roger Clemens - Everyone's got to have him as their 25th pick. I have him as my 24th.

No comments: